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Bummer Alert

Former W.A.S.P. Guitarist Chris Holmes Selling Barely Functioning '87 Firebird for Only $1,500

“It does start and can be driven, although I would not attempt to drive it any distance in its current condition.”

Chris-Holmes-in-his-Pontiac

The most memorable scene in the documentary A Decline of Western Civilization: Part II, a documentary with many memorable scenes is W.A.S.P.'s then-guitarist Chris Holmes floating in a pool talking about his alcohol problems while his mother sat poolside depressingly watching along:

Well, I am happy to report that 30 years later, Chris is thankfully still alive and boy does he have a deal for you!

You can now own Chris's 1987 Pontiac Firebird. Look at the great condition this 27 year old car is in:

Former W.A.S.P. Guitarist Chris Holmes Selling Barely Functioning '87 Firebird for Only <img decoding= Former W.A.S.P. Guitarist Chris Holmes Selling Barely Functioning '87 Firebird for Only <img loading= Former W.A.S.P. Guitarist Chris Holmes Selling Barely Functioning '87 Firebird for Only <img loading=

According to the listing, the vehicle is sold as in and "has never been registered in California and is doubtful that it will pass smog/emissions in its current state." Oh, good.

While the car does start, the ad warns "I would not attempt to drive it any distance in its current condition."

Jeez, how could this get any sweeter?

"The car starts by turning on an electric fuel pump, then a switch starts the engine." There we go. If only there was a way to sweeten the deal?

Former W.A.S.P. Guitarist Chris Holmes Selling Barely Functioning '87 Firebird for Only <img loading=

Wow, the unusable car comes signed by Chris Holmes himself. Why, here he is using the vehicle for himself:

Former W.A.S.P. Guitarist Chris Holmes Selling Barely Functioning '87 Firebird for Only <img loading=

Well, something like this is almost priceless but you can in fact own this piece of shit vehicle for ONLY $1,500. You should probably hurry up and answer the ad because I can't imagine it will be available for long…I mean, what a deal!

[Thanks to MetalSucks for bringing this to our attention]

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