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Metal Science

It's Totally Fine To Let Your Kid Listen To Metal

Blast that metal while breast-feeding, ladies!

Blast that metal while breast-feeding, ladies!

Once you reach a certain age, it seems like everybody around you is having babies… at least that's my current predicament. And it makes it a bit awkward for me. Is it okay to still go over to my friends' houses and blast metal with them? Is it okay for babies to listen to metal?

Such a question was asked recently to Wired's Mr. Know It All and the short answer is it's fine:

“As long as you keep your kid from seeing the Houses Of The Holy cover art, her brain will be just fine. There’s exactly zero evidence that one kind of music helps cognitive development more than any other.

“Plus, the supposed benefits of music come from learning to play an instrument – not just kicking back and admiring John Bonham’s drum solo in Moby Dick.

“If your tyke digs the Kitty Pap more than Physical Graffiti – suck it up. A little Wiggles now may pain your ears, but it could mean a Whole Lotta Love for the better stuff down the line.

“I certainly agree that Do The Monkey by The Wiggles belongs right next to the Barney and Elmo theme songs on Volume One ofBeelzebub’s Greatest Hits, but don’t forget the first tenet of parenthood – it’s not about you.”

Ahh yes, the Wiggles, and Nick Jr. and all the other crap parents have to go through. Maybe it's best not to introduce kids to metal at a young age, so that they don't choose to revolt against their parents later in life? Maybe pretend to like hip hop so they rebel and like metal. Maybe then, they'd create some cute video and join our Kids In Metal section. This free parenting advice comes from somebody who does not have children, so take it with a huge grain of salt.

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