A Female Perspective: How To Be A Hot Metal Chick
- Posted on September 29, 2010
by: Noa Avior
Every now and then I like to peruse the interwebs and look for all the ways that I can truly be a metal chick. Luckily, I stumbled upon the above video that adequately teaches me how to look like one. I just marveled through out the video and was so ecstatic to find such an erudite demonstrator.
I don't know why it never occurred to me that a "chick" who is a metalhead should look like a tacky whore. This whole time, why did I avoid the beauty section at Family Dollar? So many "metal concert thing" that went by and I didn't have my skull adorned with polyester multi-colored hair clip-on extensions. Alas, my face wasn't painted with Crayola markers. Oh, classic Megadeth T-shirt? I'm putting you through the paper shredder. Also, I have to now glue a cool zipper on the side of all my pants and "hardware" to my boots. I'm thinking an array of nuts, bolts, a monkey wrench, my modem, a capuchin, some bananas… ok now I'm getting carried away.
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haha….lung meat
on another note…that chick annoys me
how to be a hot metal chick – look like Noa lol!
jesus that chick is hot as fuck.
more booby, less talky
I just watched this video with the sound off, and I might watch it again!
This was absolutely hilarious! hahaha! you wanna be a super hot metal chick and blow all the boys away! first be yourself & second Play a instrument or be able to sing so the guys can incorporate you into their bands ;) I mean if you universally applied that whores look to guys we'd be knee deep in 80's hair metal again w/ guys covered in rouge and eye shadow. Fuck that!!! tight leather pants make my ghetto ass look too big ;P \m/ keep it brutal \m/
When she speaks it sounds like steam is escaping haha
COLOR IS FUN.
I second the lung-meat motion.
Like most videos involving women on YouTube: Extremely hot with the sound off. Unwatchable with the sound on.
Yeah, it also helps if you're hot BEFORE you cake on makeup and colored hair extensions
My sisters-in-(metal)arms: Watch this video, then join us in battle.
How to be a hot metal chick:
Step 1: Obtain vagina
Step 2: actually like metal
Step 3: ????
Step 4: PROFIT
Okay I know I am going to get shit for actually listening to the video with the sound on but…
The fact that she states her pants are american apparel really just negated the fact she is trying to be metal, and sorry she is hot as hell but I call bull shit on saying she likes Suffocation.
I agree with ThePantangler! Ha! This vid is comedy…
…and FUCK YEAH shinaain!
plays with her too much
instead of playing with tits
I am a firm believer in that if a girl talks shit on another girl shes just jealous. And While the make up is a little over the top, you cannot tell me this girl isn't beautiful. I would bet 90% of everyone on this board, if they are even getting pussy, there girl is ugly and or fat!!!
Despite the endless monologue It wasn't what I was paying attention to.
hahaha LSDraptor couldnt have put it better
yes the girl is hot but she is a poor portrayal of what a metal chick is. Girls who like metal go to shows to watch bands, support them and enjoy the live concert experience. Not to have guys glare at their boobs all night or make a fashion statement. You dont need testicles to care about the music.
Anyway, I appreciate everyone reading the article. I love your comments and I'm happy that ur not tools.
Girl's got some floppy mom upper arms. I wanna see a tutorial on how to get those.
as woman u don't need to do all this make-up and do ur hair thats like a sterotype of women. you just need to be ur self u don't have to impress a person' will like for who u are. by the way she looks like puss in boots but nice make -up advice but very poor portryal of a metalchick.
Noa, loved the article. But let's be real…skanky trash has it's place in the metal pecking order. Not ALL girls in the metal scene can be intelligent, articulate, and actually into the integrity of the music itself. Some poor saps just have to resort to what their momma's gave them to make it in this world . P.S. I'll race you to her lung-meat
Metal is often seen as a male-dominated genre and style, and I can see why. How can women be respected metal fans if they dress like sluts and have bullshit for brains? It's idiots like these that keep bringing us down.
Nice make-up and all, but I find it hard to believe that she's really all about the music. Of course it's great if girls know what looks good on them, but this chick needs to realize that metal is a way of life, not a fashion statement.
Noa, have you heard the new Cannibal Corpse track, "Asphyxiating on Lung Meat"?
Also what a way to ruin a perfectly fucking good Suffocation shirt…
Noa, I don't know if you saw it or not, but we had a really good discussion about this over at Metal Sucks: http://www.metalsucks.net/2010/09/30/how-to-look-like-a-hot-metal-chick/.
My thoughts on the matter are posted there.
Since when is there a "metal chick outfit"?
i love metal, and i find this to be bullshit.
SHE SAID METAL CONCERT THING! Doesn't even mention how sick Suffocation is but instead says, "make sure that you like a known band."
She's really on to something there. We all know who Noa is. She's the girl who gets all dressed up, downloads one song from each band before the show, tags along with her hardcore(also poser) new york yankee hat wearing boyfriend who does windmills and roundhouse kicks when there's not even music with breakdowns.
Fuck you Noa. you're a phony.
Shinaain, yes I saw the metalsucks post. I was happy to see that you were keeping it real for the metal sisters. I remember seeing ur name and thinking, wait she's on MI too!! :)
Forevermetal- I wrote the damn article about the girl in the video. I, Noa, am not the lameoid in it. Did u even bother to read the article or did you just watch the video? This happened on our facebook page too, ppl just watched the video and assumed she was me. Aye.
It's funny that people are acting like there aren't a ton of girls like this at metal shows. I see girls like this at pretty much every big-ish show and festival I go to.
At Maryland Deathfest last year, there were dozens of mostly naked arm-candy types standing around and posing. Why you would pay that much money to stand around and look good, I don't know. Maybe their boyfriends paid. Also, I am dying to know where they were keeping their makeup/money/cell phones, because there was absolutely no pockets to keep them in. Anyone else thinking of the opening scene from Machete?
Ok so this chick from the vid is a dick! But the comments on how people dress, seriously who gives a fuck! Since when has metal been about what brands you wear? I wear what the fuck I feel like wearing! If that's a baggy local metal band tee or my fitted immortal tank who gives a fuck! Get over yourselves